The Rudy Guiliani and Barak Huessein Obama Commemorative Assault Rifles are sitting in the Dunham's lockup, awaiting the Black Friday morning sale. They are of a type I already own multiple examples of, and I look forward to ripping them apart and putting them back together, modifying them into even more awesome, liberal-scaring weapons.
Why not the Hillary Clinton Commmemorative Assault Rifle, you ask, when Hillary is a so much bigger threat to my way of life?
The Hillary Clinton Commemorative Battle-Rifle will be purchased on the next election day. I figure the bigger the b*tch, the bigger the rifle, the better the symbolism. It will be a JLD PTR-91, in the .308 caliber. I plan on buying 2000 rounds and a metric ton of magazines between here and there. My present EBRs are not slouches in the caliber department, but the big G3 clone is a terrifyingly powerful hitter at close and long ranges. It is specifically designed to excel in battle with military troops. That is the reason it was conceived, and the reason its existance has continued in the years since World War 2. I will train with it, and I will become proficient with it, and in doing so, I will demonstrate to the world that I am not a subject, I am a citizen. I am an American.
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