Tales From Retail Pt4

4.The first time I saw the man I call Rev, I thought he was literally retarded.

He was about 4 foot nothing, and equally sized through the x and z axis. He had a face and head like Danny Devito, except Danny Devito doesn’t have eyes that bulge out like a victim of strangulation. He was pushing a shopping cart loaded with CDs, and when I asked him if I could help him, he talked in a high, squeaky voice like Alvin The Chipmunk, speaking really fast and with a major lisp.

He was looking for parody Christmas CDs, and I kindly offered to order them for him. He accepted my offer, and after ringing up his transaction with nary a word of complaint, he rather rudely asks me if I’ve exempted him from the sales tax.

I didn’t know your average Joe was exempt, file the data away for future use under Taxes: Avoidance Of, and go get a manager higher than myself to help me figure out what to do when someone’s asking for something I can’t legally give them.
The manager OK’s it, and I process everything as tax exempt. He pays with a check. Labeled “First Church Of Cain.”

Now, I’m the first in line to say nobody should get special breaks on anything, but I find it even funnier when I have to give a Satanist priest tax exempt status on Christmas comedy CDs.

To be continued…later…