I Smell Bacon

Or: The Pig Fell In The Mud

When last we interacted with the thin blue line, a city bus driver had, with no proof or witness or investigation, gotten our family charged with a $185 dollar fine which the police lowered to $85 for cooperating.

So:My dad calls back, asks the pig at the desk to go through it all once more. Turns out, the bus driver incorrectly recorded the streetnames. Whether he saw correctly or not, he definitely did NOT see it at those coordinates (one intersection over). So dad asks if the bus driver could've shut his lights off before the illegal manuever (my mom freezes around buses and red lights) and forgotten about it (having so many better things to concentrate on OTHER than writing down a license plate, make and model of a car, etc.). He then adds that to be informed about only the fine a week later means its the word of a citizen against a city official. The cops gives a variation of the didn't-work-for-the-SS routine of "We're only following orders." Says they can't have a squad car follow every bus and that bus drivers can, legally, accuse you of anything without proof and have you fined without an investigation. Not in so many words for that last part though.

My dad says we want to contest it. The cop says that given the bus driver screwed up the location, and the city just does NOT have the resources to go to court over an $85 traffic violation, they'll just drop the whole thing.

No fine.

Never underestimate the stupidity, incompetence, or maliciousness of anyone working in city government. Yes, they didn't fine us. No, it wasn't because they saw the error of their ways and have decided to become born-again good public servants. It was because they didn't have a dang thing and knew it.

I Smell Bacon

Or: Run-Ins With The Pigs Part 2.1

So, yesterday my dad receives a letter in the mail from the Green Bay police department stating something to the effect that a car registered to him (as the head of the household) violated traffic laws and he owes $185 dollars; if you require information before we shake you down, or you wish to contest this charge, call ***-***-****. (Notice the use of the emotional-charged phrase "shake you down?" That's called fore-shadowing.)

Not having been pulled over for anything recently, every driving member of the household is a mite perplexed.

My dad calls the number and receives a rundown on the charges against one of the family members. Apparently my mom turned in front of a bus. Still no recollection of having been pulled over or charged with any form of crime. Confusion all around.

Now,given the police departments previous public relations debacle with my family (taking 11 minutes to respond to an attempted home invasion 7 years ago, taking 7 minutes to get to our house when a neighbor had a heart attack (despite the standard presense of four black and whites in the area), and sending 3 B&Ws, an unmarked, and 4 armed, vested up pigs to arrest my brother for fireworks ten days before the 4th, when resounding explosions could be heard all night long for 3 weeks prior), you can probably guess that this is about to take a bad turn. It takes a lot to awe me when it comes to government incompetence, disinterest, or downright malicious behavior slash law.

I have been suitably awed.

Seems no cop was ever involved, no traffic citation ever issued, no crime ever recorded, no one ever charged. See, the bus driver wrote down the license plate, submitted it to the police department with a complaint, and without so much as sending one of the boys in blue over to get a statement, the city proceeded to charge our family nearly $200.

Without taking a statement.

Without charging anyone with a crime.

Without informing anyone of the charges against them before levying punishment.

All on one person's say so.

Because we called, were polite, and decided to cooperate, they've generously lowered the fine for the unsubstantiated, undocumented crime by $100.

Let me see if I can lay this all out in plain language, in case there's any miscommunication leading to misunderstanding here: A bus driver can write down the license plate number of any car on the road, submit it to the police with a complaint about the driver's conduct, no investigation is ever performed, no communication is innitiated, and then based on one person's word, an unsuspecting person can be fined nearly $200.

Now, does that seem...I don't know...right? Just? The way a fair and equitable government should conduct its business?

Stay tuned for breaking developments in "I Smell Bacon:Run Ins With The Pigs Pt2!"